Sunday, 27 February 2011

THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS - ENVY

Greetings Bloggers!

Having sisters is the best! I am so blessed to have three of the best sisters one could ever ask for. They are my life and keep me sane. Simone’ has an incredible intellect and memory. Kim is the only who has beautiful curly hair and is a gentle, wise old soul. Ellie is the feisty fashionista, always on her own beat and incredibly fun. Together we make up ‘KEST’, we’re all different in many ways and we honour who we are as individuals.

I had an experience with an envious person in high school, a so-called best friend who ridiculed my beliefs (this was her way of having a sense of humour).
I was a loner at school, very quiet, an art geek if you will. Yet, I had an active social life out of school, frequented many parties and had loads of boyfriends. This ‘friend’ of mine had never dated or wore make up and was battling a weight problem. She put on weight very easily and had a sweet tooth, while I ate lots and never put on weight at all. She would curse me every time I tucked into a bag of chips and say she hated me for being thin. On the weekends, I would get out of my school uniform, put on my flashy clothes (usually something snake-skin/leopard print, high heeled boots, lots of make up, there’s a little Jerseylicious inside me) and let the party girl come out to play. On Monday Morning, I’d be back in my school uniform and be the best behaved girl I could be.
I would relate stories about my weekend to this ‘friend’ and she would laugh and then, in passing, say I was wild or my parents didn’t care about what I did. This was so not true! My parents are like the Huxtables from the Cosby Show. They instilled good qualities in us girls and we knew our boundaries. I was never restricted in what I wore because they understood this was how I expressed myself. As long as I brought home good grades, had manners, kept my curfews and didn’t get arrested on the weekend, they were happy.

When we finished school, I found that this ‘friend’ of mine was starting to behave very differently. She came from a very strict home and now that she had turned eighteen, she was starting to enjoy some freedom. She became very outspoken and directed much of her negative talk about me to her new campus friends. She told them I was a wild girl who had too many boyfriends and partied too much. Slowly, she started dressing like me and talking about the guys she had met at her own parties. One night I hooked up with a guy at a party and couldn’t wait to tell her the next day. She seemed happy for me, yet I didn’t hear from her for about two weeks afterwards. The guy in question was also scarce and I heard through the grapevine that he had met someone claiming to be my ‘friend’ on a bus. He said that this girl told him I was not a nice girl to be hanging around with, that I would break his heart and that I was fake. A month passed and still I had not been able to get in touch with her. Then I discovered she had started to date the same guy I had hooked up with!

Envy is a form of self-hate. If you envy someone because you feel they have something or someone better, then you prove that you are lacking in self esteem. Envy hurts you, not the person you’re envying. You get angry with yourself or life for not blessing you with what you’re envying.

My ‘friend’ needed to feel validated, as a person and woman. It’s a pity she felt she could only get that through the attention of a guy. After months of not hearing from her, she posted a letter to me showing me a picture of a ring that very same guy had given her for Valentines Day. I wrote back, told her I was genuinely happy for her, wished her well and made the decision to end our friendship. I am a kind person, but I ain’t stupid. I knew she was flaunting her commitment with a guy I had had my eye on first and she was just being mean-spirited. But I was bigger than that. I believe things have a way of working out and they did!

If you’re feeling envious of someone right now, ask yourself why you feel having what they have would make you better or more important. If you’re envious of someone who has a partner, don’t hate on them or steal their lovers. What your heart really wants is to feel loved and needed.
Solution: Learn to love yourself as you are and accept your flaws. When you are happy with yourself you will be a magnet to the opposite sex.

If you’re envious of someone because they have more abundance materially, what you really want is  to feel a sense of power or status. You want financial stability. There is enough money in this world for us all.
Solution: Find a way to cut your own path and be receptive to the abundance that is your divine right. Don’t feel that lots of money can give you happiness though, happiness comes from feeling good about yourself and your life. Money buys creature comfort and pays the bills. Money is just a form of energy, be happy and receptive and it will easily flow into your life.

If you’re envious of someone’s looks, then don’t be angry you don’t look like them. You were created in the perfect image and likeness of God. If you don’t like your thin lips or big nose, learn to like it! I never liked my pixie-nose until a stranger told me I had a beautiful nose. When I looked in the mirror after that, I suddenly found it pretty for the first time! Work with what you have, be groomed, present yourself in the best way you can and enjoy the compliments that flow! Looks capture attention, but personality captures heart. Remember that.

If you’re envious of any other reason, try to think of WHY it is you want something that someone else has. We are all born with unique gifts and talents. If you are here on earth, there is a purpose for you. We deserve to be here, we need to own our space and our inner power.
This year, make a resolution to be more of your authentic self. Trust in the infinite wisdom of a divine plan. You are all beautiful in your own way!!!
Love and Light,
Your Resident Psychic and Spirit Medium,
Tennille*

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